*please no one report me for typing this for this because in NO WAY do I take credit for these lyrics that sprang to my mind...
I stopped by the bar at 3 A.M.
To seek solace in a bottle or possibly a friend
And I woke up with a headache like my head against a board
Twice as cloudy as I'd been the night before
And I went in seeking clarity
There is a reason, and not just the catchy tune, that I can recite these lyrics every time they come on. And for why it resonated in the Barbie movie so perfectly. What was she, if not conflicted about her place in the world v. where she thought she should be?
And you have reiterated it nicely, between two things, on a Friday for me.
There's more than one answer to these questions
Pointing me in a crooked line
And the less I seek my source for some definitive
Closer I am to fine, yeah.
xoxo
Liz
(solar panels on the roof. fast fashion in the closet.)
Your new Substack bio made me smile, because it pretty much exactly describes me! You've put words to something I've struggled with for a long time, but not been able to pinpoint, that I am in fact, a person made up of so many contradictions, that I feel lost in them, searching for just a few things that are certain, but then I just find more contradictions. May we find peace in our contradictions, nothing is certain.
I love everything about this post and grateful to have found you. I relate to so much and the best way I can encapsulate my 40s (turning 47 this year) is simply the realization that I hate boxes. I refuse to be put in a box and I do everything not to put others in a box. No black & white and not even gray but instead I prefer to live in color! Thank you, thank you, thank you for pouring it all out there. Your honesty is a gift!
So good! I feel this deeply. I get so annoyed by the reductionistic way we Americans label and brand everything—especially ourselves. No person can be "just one thing."
gosh, I love this soo sooo much, it's everything really. clarity is overrated. love your authenticity, everything, and everything really is the messy middle. I'll take honesty any day over the packaging we are all surrounded with. grateful for your words
This is really interesting to me. I think a lot about the word "integrated" in a similar way. I used to think being integrated meant everything lined up perfectly, values and habits and actions. Now I think admitting that they *can't* line up perfectly is part of the integration/honesty.
My father-in-law was an architect, and one time he was ranting about the new modern buildings with elaborate unconventional exterior shapes. He said at the end of the day, they all have structure underneath the exterior because gravity and physics are real. Your post made me think of this, because I wonder if an objective sense of truth and goodness are like gravity and physics. We're going to be unsatisfied if we live on a foundation of mystery and uncertainty. Like you said, there's a tension to this, and we can go overboard with fearfully clinging to certainty. But from my experience, too much "permission" isn't enjoyable.
This is more about intellectual and moral humility—admitting we’re always going to fail. I think putting that kind of “expected imperfection” at the center of our lives is something you’d agree with. It doesn’t mean we don’t have a strong ideological foundation—just the opposite.
yes! and how about the amazing gift of being able to see and feel it all? Found one for you: ☯️ (sorry lol)
*please no one report me for typing this for this because in NO WAY do I take credit for these lyrics that sprang to my mind...
I stopped by the bar at 3 A.M.
To seek solace in a bottle or possibly a friend
And I woke up with a headache like my head against a board
Twice as cloudy as I'd been the night before
And I went in seeking clarity
There is a reason, and not just the catchy tune, that I can recite these lyrics every time they come on. And for why it resonated in the Barbie movie so perfectly. What was she, if not conflicted about her place in the world v. where she thought she should be?
And you have reiterated it nicely, between two things, on a Friday for me.
There's more than one answer to these questions
Pointing me in a crooked line
And the less I seek my source for some definitive
Closer I am to fine, yeah.
xoxo
Liz
(solar panels on the roof. fast fashion in the closet.)
I’ve almost used these lyrics here before! Pure gold.
Love this, it's all about duality or complexity. We can't be just one thing. We are so many things all at once. And that's ok, that makes us human.
Your new Substack bio made me smile, because it pretty much exactly describes me! You've put words to something I've struggled with for a long time, but not been able to pinpoint, that I am in fact, a person made up of so many contradictions, that I feel lost in them, searching for just a few things that are certain, but then I just find more contradictions. May we find peace in our contradictions, nothing is certain.
Beautifully put, Esther. I love the idea of making peace with your own contradictions.
I love everything about this post and grateful to have found you. I relate to so much and the best way I can encapsulate my 40s (turning 47 this year) is simply the realization that I hate boxes. I refuse to be put in a box and I do everything not to put others in a box. No black & white and not even gray but instead I prefer to live in color! Thank you, thank you, thank you for pouring it all out there. Your honesty is a gift!
Yes, the shift from a "boxes mindset" to something more fluid changed my life!
So good! I feel this deeply. I get so annoyed by the reductionistic way we Americans label and brand everything—especially ourselves. No person can be "just one thing."
Well said.
wow. just keep writing forever. please. and i really hope you can get lots of $$$ for this talent someday. xoxo
I just turned 40 and didn’t know how much I needed to read something like this. Thank you 🙏…your words made me feel seen and less alone.
❤️❤️❤️
Same on just turning 40… what a doozy 🤪
Totally gave me permission. Love your style, too, thank you!
gosh, I love this soo sooo much, it's everything really. clarity is overrated. love your authenticity, everything, and everything really is the messy middle. I'll take honesty any day over the packaging we are all surrounded with. grateful for your words
🙏🏻
My word for the year is congruent. My goal is to walk my talk and be an example. But you are telling me that I can have my Oreo’s?
This is really interesting to me. I think a lot about the word "integrated" in a similar way. I used to think being integrated meant everything lined up perfectly, values and habits and actions. Now I think admitting that they *can't* line up perfectly is part of the integration/honesty.
Ugh! Too much truth in this post. If not “clarity”, well then, what have I been striving for all these 67 years? 😂
Such a fun read. So relatable and thanks for the permission to laugh at myself a bit.
Thanks Mike. I'd go crazy if I took myself too seriously!
God will definitely have a beard.
But will there be ponies?!
My father-in-law was an architect, and one time he was ranting about the new modern buildings with elaborate unconventional exterior shapes. He said at the end of the day, they all have structure underneath the exterior because gravity and physics are real. Your post made me think of this, because I wonder if an objective sense of truth and goodness are like gravity and physics. We're going to be unsatisfied if we live on a foundation of mystery and uncertainty. Like you said, there's a tension to this, and we can go overboard with fearfully clinging to certainty. But from my experience, too much "permission" isn't enjoyable.
This is more about intellectual and moral humility—admitting we’re always going to fail. I think putting that kind of “expected imperfection” at the center of our lives is something you’d agree with. It doesn’t mean we don’t have a strong ideological foundation—just the opposite.